What is love?
Is it simply a feeling? Does anyone really know? In John 15:12-13 Jesus says, “My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.”
But do we really know the true meaning of love? When you first meet someone, and you begin to get to know them, your feelings at that point in time may not be love. It may simply be infatuation.
Infatuation is instant desire, one set of glands calling to another. Love is friendship that has caught fire. It takes root and grows, one day at a time.
Infatuation is marked by a feeling of insecurity. You are excited and eager, but not genuinely happy. There are nagging doubts, unanswered questions, little bits and pieces about your beloved that you would just as soon not examine too closely. It might spoil the dream.
Love is the quiet understanding and mature acceptance of imperfection. It is real. It gives you strength and grows beyond you, to bolster your beloved. You are warmed by their presence, even when they are away. Miles do not separate you. You have so many wonderful little films in your head that you keep replaying. But near or far, you know they are yours, and you can wait.
Infatuation says, "We must get married right away. I can't risk losing them." Love says, "Be patient. Don't panic. Plan your future with confidence."
Infatuation has an element of sexual excitement. Whenever you are together, you hope it will end in intimacy. Love is not based on sex. It is the maturation of friendship, which makes sex so much sweeter. You must be friends before you can be lovers.
Infatuation lacks confidence. When they're away, you wonder if they're cheating. Sometimes, you check. Love means trust. You are calm, secure and unthreatened. They feel your trust, and it makes them even more trustworthy.
Infatuation might lead you to do things you will regret, but love never steers you in the wrong direction. Love is an upper. It makes you feel whole. It completes the circle. It fills the empty space in your heart. Love is elevating. It lifts you up. It makes you look up. It makes you think up. It makes you a better person than you were before. If you have love in your life, it can make up for a great many things you don't have. If there is no love in your life, whatever else there is has a lot less meaning.
The secret of our being is not only to live but to have something to live for.
